DEAL ACCEPTED: New Orleans Saints Tight end Taysom Hill Signs a 4-year Contract …

DEAL ACCEPTED: New Orleans Saints Tight End Taysom Hill Signs 4-Year, $109 Million Contract With Boston Celtics as Their New “Positionless Power”

June 16, 2025 — Boston, MA

In one of the most shocking and bizarre sports crossovers in recent memory, the Boston Celtics have officially signed NFL utility man and New Orleans Saints tight end Taysom Hill to a four-year, $109 million contract, marking his entry into the NBA as the Celtics’ new “positionless power” — a hybrid role that’s left analysts and fans both baffled and intrigued.

Known for doing literally everything on a football field — from quarterback to tight end, special teams ace to fullback — Taysom Hill is now bringing his brand of chaos to the hardwood.

“We saw the way he runs over linebackers and thought, ‘Why not power forwards?’” said Celtics GM Brad Stevens, when asked what led to the move. “Taysom’s versatility is unmatched in sports. We’re not just building a basketball team anymore — we’re building a movement.”

According to team sources, Hill will take on a new hybrid role described as “point-center-defender-forward-back.” While it’s unclear if Hill can shoot a basketball with any accuracy, early footage from closed practices shows him setting the hardest screens in league history, leading the break like a fullback in transition, and occasionally lowering his shoulder into defenders like it’s 3rd and short.

“I’ve never played organized basketball,” Hill admitted during his introductory press conference, “but I’ve been bodying people since BYU, and I’m ready to dunk on some centers.”

Fans are already buzzing on social media, calling him “LeBrawn James,” “Draymond with a Helmet,” and “The Fullback of the Future.”

The $109 million contract, fully guaranteed, raised some eyebrows — especially since Hill has yet to play a single NBA minute. But the Celtics believe his conditioning, leadership, and gladiator mindset will translate immediately.

“He’s 6’2″, 220 pounds of raw energy and muscle,” said new Celtics head coach Sam Cassell. “We’re not playing position basketball anymore. We’re playing Taysom Ball.”

No word yet on whether Hill will continue suiting up for the Saints on Sundays, but sources say there’s an “open clause” allowing him to return for red zone packages if the Celtics have a day off.

UPDATE: In a surprise twist, ESPN is reporting that Hill has been listed as “Questionable” for the Celtics’ Summer League opener — not due to injury, but because no one can figure out what position he plays.

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