NBA COMMUNITY ARE OVERJOY AND ALSO: Excited As Boston Celtics’ National Basketball Association NBA Head Coach Joe Mazzulla makes announcements of making third baseman/shortstop Paul Molitor the new V…….see more
NBA COMMUNITY OVERJOYED AND ALSO: EXCITED AS BOSTON CELTICS’ HEAD COACH JOE MAZZULLA ANNOUNCES THIRD BASEMAN/SHORTSTOP PAUL MOLITOR AS NEW VICE PRESIDENT OF… SOMETHING
Minnesota Twins baseball star Paul Molitor is introduced to the crowd Sunday, July 24, 2005, at a Tee Ball game on the South Lawn of the White House, where he participated as first base coach. White House photo by Paul Morse
In a move that has left both NBA insiders and MLB historians blinking in disbelief, Boston Celtics head coach Joe Mazzulla held a surprise press conference Friday morning to announce that Hall of Fame third baseman and shortstop Paul Molitor will be joining the Celtics’ front office as the new Vice President of Vibe and Velocity.
“Basketball needs more base-running instincts,” Mazzulla said confidently. “Paul Molitor understands movement, timing, and how to turn a double play — which, to me, translates directly into guarding the pick and roll.”
Molitor, 69, who last played professional baseball in 1998 and has never coached or worked in basketball, stood next to Mazzulla nodding solemnly, wearing a custom Celtics jersey with “MOLITOR #3B” on the back. He reportedly spent the offseason binge-watching NBA League Pass and believes he’s “starting to get the hang of this whole basketball thing.”
“A Natural Fit”
According to Mazzulla, the idea struck him during a meditation session at midcourt after reading a biography of Molitor’s batting average. “I said to myself: if this guy can hit .306 over two decades, imagine what he can do for our offensive spacing.”
Molitor is expected to oversee a wide range of responsibilities, including:
- Ensuring all layups are treated like sliding into home
- Leading “chalk talk” using a baseball diamond-shaped whiteboard
- Calling timeouts with hand signals from the dugout (bench)
- Replacing the pick-and-roll with the “bunt-and-cut”
The NBA community responded with a mix of shock and amusement.
Charles Barkley, appearing on Inside the NBA, said: “I thought I had wild takes, but this one’s got me speechless. That’s like hiring a sushi chef to run a barbecue joint.”
Stephen A. Smith added: “This is either genius… or evidence that Joe Mazzulla hasn’t slept since the playoffs.”
Fans Are… Surprisingly Into It?
Surprisingly, fan reactions have been largely positive. One Celtics fan outside TD Garden said, “Look, we tried everything else. Why not a baseball legend? The Knicks just hired an AI chatbot as assistant coach. Anything goes.”
Even Jayson Tatum weighed in: “I met Paul once. I think. Or maybe it was a guy named Paul at Fenway. Either way, let’s hoop.”
Molitor will begin his new role immediately, reportedly starting with reviewing Celtics game film while also teaching the players how to properly chew sunflower seeds.
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